I know, sounds exciting.
To me, it's the best Friday night ever.
This past Friday night, I watched a movie called Celeste and Jesse Forever.
You can watch the trailer to understand what the movie is about. I really enjoyed it.
(Oh and for the record, the last movie I watched was Lovely, Still. It's on my favorite list now. Loved it!)
One of the things that really stuck me about C and J Forever was the appearance of my favorite question:
Would you rather be right or happy?
I've only asked myself this question a million times on this blog. Another phrase I heard in the movie was "contempt prior to investigation". Making judgements without knowing the whole story.
And this one, best quote of all:
“When we are no longer able to change a situation, we are challenged to change ourselves. What? It’s Viktor Frankl…or maybe it was Biggie Smalls. I don’t know.”
Needless to say, the movie really spoke my language. Or else, it was just what I needed to hear.
I have found that my judgements of people are keeping me from experiencing pure joy. I understand "contempt prior to investigation". I understand it because I've done it, especially recently the past few years or so. I did it with my sister's new husband. I did it with my ex's new wife.
Hell, I've even done it with Gentleman Jack. And MYSELF.
I am so convinced that I'm right about certain things that I'm not allowing OTHER THINGS to show up.
These judgements don't make me happy. In fact, they keep me stuck right where I am. I end up rolling my eyes when my sister's new husband acts exactly the way I'd think he would. I shake my head when the ex's new wife does exactly what I'd expect. I want to run away when I see the limitations I put on GJ and I get downright mad when my own life seems small.
I don't want to be right about these things. I don't want to see limitations and frustrations. I can't change these people and make them be who I'd like them to be. I can't change the things that show up in my life. So what if they're not showing up the way I want them to. Isn't that my problem?
When we are no longer able to change a situation, we are challenged to change ourselves....
Isn't that the truth of it all?
I give my power away by wanting things to be different than they are. I can, however, change the way I see these things. I can open myself up to a new perception and a new experience. I don't have to be right. It doesn't serve me. I can, instead, allow them, situations and other things to be who they are and love anyway.
Allow. There's that word again.
This isn't a new discovery, but one that keeps showing up in my life. I recently talked about it in January while watching a Marianne Williamson interview. I've written about it for years. I learned it while studying A Course in Miracles. I know that I can't change the world, but I can change my mind about it.
It all starts with me.
I can change my mind about myself, the limits I put on my time, my value, my existence in others' lives.
I recall, when I was going through my divorce, that yoga was so healing to me. One of the little healing mantra songs I was taught to sing came back into my mind recently:
I am the light of my soul
I am beautiful
I am bountiful
I am bliss
If I keep reminding myself of this, if I learn to be gentle with myself, if I can allow myself to show up however I am and love me anyway, I can do the same for others.
Don't you think?