Saturday, January 24, 2009

Victoria's Secret

Today would have been my grandma Victoria's 95 birthday. My mother wanted to write a dedication in her honor.

So today, I give you.... Mom:


What else can I say, I think she was the best mom ever. Today is her birthday. She would have been 95, and she would be very mad at me if she knew I was going around telling everybody how old she was.

She always said that it was "VICTORIA'S SECRET".

She also said, if people wanted to know, they could visit her grave site and read it off of her tombstone. But I know if it was left up to her, there would not be any "dates" on her tombstone. She was just that way, and I never understood why.

I always thought she was so beautiful. I wish she could have seen herself through my eyes. She had the perfect smile, which she gave to all 3 of my children. I thank her for that.

My mom had 5 boys before I was born. She said that she prayed and prayed for a girl.

TA-DA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Me.

One other thing that she did was make a promise to God that I would be a NUN. Well------------I kind of went astray.

At the time, her sister had 2 daughters that were nuns. I guess that explains why she was so strict with me as I was trying to grow up. I didn't understand it then, but as I got out on my own, and had daughters of my own, I understood a lot better.

I don't want to say that my mom "never worked". She did not work outside the home, meaning she did not get up every morning and drive to work. That woman worked her butt off. She was raising a house full of kids, and back then, they didn't have inside bathrooms, washing machines, running water. It was one of her favorite stories to tell of how she got water up that hill, and where she had to haul it from. And on top of everything else, she stayed pregnant most of the time.

Her and dad were HARD CORE CATHOLICS. She did not believe in birth control. I was taught not to believe in it either.


Ha! If it was up to me, I would have had 3 more, but it takes 2 to tango.

My mom was a very stern woman. When she spoke, you stopped what you were doing, and you would listen to what was being said. When she got mad, you knew you were in trouble. She would make us go outside and pick a switch off the bushes, and bring it back in the house so she could beat the crap out of you. Oh, but don't pick a little switch, because you had to go back out and get another one, and I think it hurt worse after you tried to trick her. If you tried to run, she never ran after you, she would always say, "You have to come home to supper", and that's when you really got it. Because by then, you would have thought that she forgot, but hell no, she had been simmering all day. And on top of that, by that time, daddy was home and you got it twice. Daddy did not use a switch, he used his belt. One thing I can say, my daddy never whipped me.

He let my mom do it. I guess he thought he would have hurt me. Hell, he would have killed me.

I don't think there was ever a day that my daddy didn't work. He worked at the air force base for years, then ended up at a local Army post where he retired. We always had food on the table, and we ate what was put in front of us. My daddy raised cows, chickens, pigs, grew peanuts. We had a huge garden every year. My mom always canned fruits and vegetables, so we had fresh stuff all winter long. Plus whatever my brothers would kill in the woods. Half of the time, we did not know what it was, we just knew it tasted good, because my mom could make road kill into a gourmet meal.

Not that she ever did. HMMMM, OR DID SHE?

Anyway, we all had our chores to do. No one was lazy in my family. My mom started giving us chores I think before we could walk good. I knew that I had to have my bed fixed before I left for school every morning. It must be why to this day, every morning when I get out of bed, I turn right around and fix my bed. That is one thing that has stuck with me all these years.

We had to feed the cows, chickens, slop the hogs. In the summer, we had to get up early and get in the garden and hoe. We had what seemed like miles and miles of rows to hoe. I will never forget the feel of fresh plowed dirt between my toes. Even now, when I am out and about, I will see a fresh plowed field, I look over and just smile. I usually tell my granddaughter that I would like to run through the field barefoot, and she looks at me like I have lost my mind. It was a different place, and different time - a better time. I guess that is why me and my brother get on the phone sometimes and talk for hours about "THE GOOD OLE' DAYS" and they were certainly that.

I would not take a million dollars for the way I was brought up, because I was already the richest person in the world.

I had everything. Wonderful parents, crazy brothers and sister, a HOME.

You can't go back, but you can keep all the memories in your heart. I thank God for all of that, but on a day like today, it's kind of sad because I REALLY MISS MY MOM.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MOM, you have got to be in Heaven.

After daddy died, I know how much you missed him. It took only a year, and he came and got you. I hope you two are together. You would always tell me that you didn't mind dying, it was just that you stay dead for so long. You were a trip. The last time I was home, I walked in your bedroom and I could smell you. I walked in your closet and ran my hands on your clothes which are still hanging there. I miss you.

In my mom's last days, she had to be put in a nursing home. I would visit her every chance I got. It would really scare me when she would tell me that she saw daddy a lot. I did not know that your time was near. So when old people tell you these things, don't think they are crazy, there is something to this.


Your daughter.


  1. I enjoyed reading this, thanks for sharing!

  2. Great story, thank you and your mother for sharing!

  3. Just lovely! Happy Birthday to Victoria! Wonderful how alive she is kept in your memories!

    Be well, T.

  4. Very sweet! I was just telling my Mom how much I love her, how are days are numbered and that we need to cherish the time we do have together. Sweet story! Thank you for sharing!

    p.s. That's ALOT of CHORES!!!

  5. perfectly written, a beautiful tribute to be sure.

  6. OK, how cool that your mom is a guest poster on your blog :) That is an amazing tribute, and why am I not surprised that you have a legacy of strong women behind you?


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