You know those Verizon ads where the group of people follows the person with the cell phone wherever they go and always makes sure they're connected and well taken care of?
Yeah. That's how I feel about you guys.
I can barely read my last post. That was such a deep dark feeling. I'm sure to go there again... but it feels good to know that if I do, I have my network to make sure I'm taken care of.
You guys are the best!!!
There was one comment in particular that seemed to get everyone in a very protective huff.
Oh I laughed and cried so much at your wonderful loving responses!!!
First of all, let me say that yes, this blog is "self absorbed and egotistical". If you read in the sidebar over there on the right, it says, "This is an adventure in self-discovery..."
Secondly, all of us are "self-absorbed and egotistical". We live our lives trying to be happy, nurturing ourselves and the ones we love, doing our best to stay alive or keep those we love from harms way, and so on. All of us are doing our best to serve our own, or those we love's, best interests.
But allow me to address this person's issue with the line in that post:
I actually thought, before Gentleman Jack came over, "Well, if we did work out, I might lose some readers."
I suppose I wrote that because sometimes I feel that people come to read here purely for the drama.
I wondered, "Would people want to read about a drama-free, happy life?"
I don't know but I often think that you all come to read here for one of 3 reasons:
- "Whew! I'm so glad to see someone suffering more than me!"
- "Wow. This person is going through the exact same suffering as me!"
- "Whoa. I'm glad I'm not suffering as much as this person."
Here's the thing I've forgotten: We're all suffering all the time.
Last week in yoga, the class centered on compassion.
We went through a mantra with three different mudras:
- Focusing on compassion for those who suffer more than me.
- Focusing on compassion for those that suffer the same as me.
- Focusing on compassion for those that suffer less than me.
It reminded me of a line from A Course in Miracles where it states that we believe that there is a "hierarchy of illusions"; meaning that there are levels of suffering.
Doesn't it seem like most of us are all suffering all the time? I mean, I've been in so many positions in my life: financially set and financially poor, fat and thin, ugly and pretty, married and single.... and I know for a fact that I didn't always choose happiness. I know for a fact that even then I wanted something to be different.
Does it really matter who seemingly has it better, the same or worse than us when even they will have something that they want to change?
So, I choose a happy, drama-free life.
I do realize, however, that even in that choice, there will be still be something that I will want more or less of. I am surprisingly human.
And being human, there will be something that someone else will relate to. There will also be some people who just don't get me.
I'm gonna aim for it anyway.
I deserve it. We all do. Whether we get there or not, I say: