Sunday, November 15, 2009

Innate



When you fall in love with someone, you learn what gives them pleasure.

Maybe they like to hold hands.... or to always have a heavy arm on your shoulder.

Maybe they like gentle teasing kisses on their face.... or your tongue darting in, out and around their open mouths.

Maybe they like to be caressed softly across their bare skin.... or fingernails raked across their back.

Maybe they like soft whispers in their ear.... or screaming moans when you cum.

Maybe they like all of those things... but only at certain times.

When you fall in love with someone, you learn how to give them pleasure. You also have to learn what to do with their pain.


Maybe they want to be held and commiserated with.... or a smile and positive words.

Maybe they want to shut down and not speak... or gently cajoled into spilling all their hurt.

Maybe they want to be left alone.... or maybe that's the worst thing you can do.

Maybe loving words will soothe them.... or maybe a loving touch instead...

....or maybe they don't want to be touched at all.

Maybe they like all of those things... but only at certain times.


Either way, all that you can do is try to find the correct combination of those *things* AND those *certain times*. In the process, you may feel like you're in a foreign land with no translators.

The good news is that if you immerse yourself in a foreign territory long enough, you begin to understand the language and the customs...

The fear leaves you. You fall into routine. You relax. You smile more.

Eventually, it becomes innate. Eventually, it feels like home.

Eventually.

13 comments:

  1. This takes time in any relationship. It's one of the beautiful things about developing a close, intimate relationship with someone. Enjoy this. :)

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  2. This is quite lovely, and I believe, absolutely true.

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  3. Agreed. And I would like to have that someday too.

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  4. It definitely takes time, effort, and patience to get to that point, but it does eventually come. *hugs*

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  5. Beautiful post...and I may print it out and keep it on the fridge.

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  6. Great post. Falling in love is fun. Getting to know someone intimately like that... I remember what it's like. Glad you are experiencing these moments! Enjoy

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  7. beautiful post!!! Just had to say it!

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  8. This was a fantastic blog about relationships and being human. I loved it. These are the kinds of ideas that I would like to teach my kids sans the sex part. :)

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  9. What do think about men being celibate to avoid hurting women? Our libidos are really strong. I'm reading your blogs trying to figure it out for my life. I'm MoralWar on Twitter.

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  10. Well, way to make me feel lonely. ;)

    Kidding sweet pea. Great post.

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  11. Hmmm, I haven't known that feeling in so long. I miss it.

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