I was reminded to allow.
Allowing has been a consistent message for me for quite a while now. Ever since I wrote about the phrase it is what it is, I hear it at least every other day from someone in my life. So strange...
Rachel Sarah wrote her own post on allowing after my realization that my controlling is due to fear and allowing comes from faith. I have also written recently that my Gentleman says he loves me because I allow him to.
I've noticed that I've been feeling supported lately, and because of that support, I feel that I am allowed to relax.
I've been working on allowing myself to feel whatever I feel. I've learned that if I'm aware of an emotion and allow it to sink into me, it passes much quicker.
I'm learning to allow myself, others and situations to be imperfect.
In my A Course in Miracles study group this weekend, we discussed that all of us are always connected to God but that we "choke off" or "block" the awareness to it. We feel alone, isolated and depressed when we stop allowing the divinity to flow.
I believe the same thing about love. I do believe that love is constantly present but I put up such resistance to it by deciding exactly what I want it to look like.
I've been hearing the same thoughts about money lately too. And health. And success.
"There is not a source of sickness. There is just the disallowance of wellness."
Gentleman Jack and I have discussed that each of us have money issues because of limiting beliefs about it. He believes that he has to work his ASS off for money or he will always struggle. Then he gets exhausted from struggling and working his ass off and begins to have financial issues. I've been trying to convince us both that we need to allow the money to come. Because when we tap into that 'allowing', the money shows up.
The most difficult part of allowing is believing that we're worth the ease. Most everyone believes in the struggle... struggle to live, to make ends meet, to find love, to be healthy.
Divine inspiration doesn't come when I'm struggling or overthinking about something.
When I was a computer programmer fighting to get my program to run, the fighting didn't fix it. It was only after I went to bed and stopped thinking about it that my answer would come.
When I can't find something, stressing on where I last left seems to only push it further away and frustrate me more. When I move on to another thought, THAT'S when it suddenly appears.
There was a yoga pose that I loathed. I would fight it and think all sorts of negative thoughts about how I'd never be able to do it. Of course, I never could. Until the day I finally allowed myself to try it without thinking about it. I just... did it. Now the pose is a favorite of mine.
I stopped forcing it and allowed it to be.
I use to pray and pray for answers, deciding ahead of time what I hoped the answer would be. Now I believe that prayer isn't asking, but listening. A quiet mind allows me to be aware of and more accepting of my answers. The divine answers that come to me without my force are the ones that always lead to my greater good.
I could go on and on about the ways I am learning to allow and how my limiting beliefs block those things I desire in my life. Instead, I want to paraphrase a story from an article written by Karen Salmansohn.
There was a study of goldfish in an aquarium with a glass wall down the middle of the tank. The fish thought they could swim past the glass, since they could see past it, but they would instead run into the glass. They finally resigned to their limited space and even when the glass was removed, they never again attempted to swim past where the glass once was.
I do the same thing. I become afraid to dream because of past disappointments. I am afraid to try because of beliefs that I was taught from a young age or because of society or extenuating circumstances from past situations. I resist divine allowing because I think I know better. I think I have to struggle, force or control things or else I won't be happy.
I fail to remember the question, "Would you rather be right or happy?"
I choose to be happy. I choose to dream. I choose to believe that I'm worth it, gently encouraging and patiently persuading myself to think a little bigger than I did before. I choose to allow the goodness and the unlimited possibilities back into my life.
I choose to kick my fin into full gear and try to swim to the other side of the tank.
I may forget all of this tomorrow. My faith will waver. I will become resistant, scared, doubting and controlling... but beyond that is yet another message that anything is possible.
I'm always grateful for another chance to choose again.
"When your heart is singing, you are allowing Well-being. When you are appreciating, you are allowing Well-being. When you are yelling at somebody, you're not. When you're feeling insecure, you're not. When you're frustrated, you're not."