Tuesday, June 8, 2010

Sexy Sharing

I've noticed that several readers click through to some of the sexy bloggers on my blog roll.

If you do, or haven't yet, you will notice that I enjoy looking at or reading erotic photographs and stories. You will also find that I read about couples that are into swinging.

Why?

Because its hot.

I've blogged in the past about my own thoughts and fears related to monogamy. I also know that, as humans, we are never satisfied. There is always something newer, better, shinier, faster, prettier... Unless we can remain connected with our true selves (and that should be True Selves), we will be as easily distracted as someone with ADHD at a Cirque du Soleil show.

Guess what?

SURPRISE!

Its completely normal!

Now, whether or not we act on it? That's a whole different topic. We learn to control these urges, don't we? We learn to control our addictions to food, alcohol, watching TV, sweets, sex.

Ah sex...

Its always fun to fantasize about it, isn't it?

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According to Jeff Mac's book, Manslations, men fantasize about women they see or meet every day.

He said its *normal*.

We've all read that men have sex on the brain most of the time.

Well, guess what men? There are girls out there like that too.

I'm guilty of it and not ashamed to admit it. I like sex. I enjoy porn. I like seeing girls strip. I love erotic photographs. And yes, if you're gonna blog about sex, you can be damn certain that I will be reading.

Then I'll most likely begin a comment with "Woohoo!!"

I like to look at it. Read about it. Write about it. Think about it. Do it.

Because I. LOVE. SEX.

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Gentleman Jack told me, before we even met, that he believes in monogamy.

We'd already discussed my colorful past in my previous relationship and my liaisons with women. He surprised me with this statement as I'd never heard a man so upfront about a committed sexual relationship.

I love this about him. He makes me believe in it too.

But we still love to fantasize.

I have never shared my fantasies before and I have never had a man want to share his fantasies with me. It surprised me, at first.

Since then I have read article after article about sharing fantasies with your lover. It spices things up. It opens up communication on many different levels.

However, just as with a swinging married couple, sharing fantasy involves A LOT of trust and discussion. There have been some times that he wants to share a fantasy and I simply can't handle it. The same can be said for him. We both have to remain very aware of each other's mentality in that moment - either logical or emotional.

When we do share these fantasies with each other, with complete understanding and trust that they are *only fantasies*, it opens up a whole new world.

I mean, what's hotter than your lover saying this turns me on... and YOU get to benefit? Just like I said about masturbation, I think that knowing what turns you on and sharing that with your partner, makes for a wonderful sex life.

I really believe that is why our sex life continues to get better and better.

Have you ever shared your fantasies?

***

Here are a few other sex-positive places on the web that aren't in my blogroll:

LOVE the animated sex positions on this site's sex position guide:

Courtesy of SexInfo101.com


A blogger who teaches blowjobs. I like it. And it never hurts to learn more, right?
http://iteachbjs.blogspot.com/


I'm in love with Liberator sex furniture:
http://www.liberator.com/


Sexis rocks. And even more specifically: Tuesdays with Nina
(I crush on Nina Hartley. Bad.)
http://www.edenfantasys.com/sexis/



I also love Susie Bright. She does an online podcast called, "In bed with Susie Bright". Lets just say a certain blogger that you're currently reading did an interview with Susie not too long ago. Subscribe to her podcasts and you could hear me. *big smile*
http://susiebright.blogs.com/susie_brights_journal_/



Do you have any sexy websites you'd like to share?

9 comments:

  1. I think Sunshine is the only girlfriend I've ever disclosed most of my sexual fantasies to. And what's better is that she has helped fulfill some of those fantasies.

    Having said that...I love reading your sexy stories, T. I'll never forget the first time reading your "One Hot Night" post. Damn...

    And yes...fantasies are great. I certainly have more than my fair share.

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  2. Hooray for sex. I'm cracking up at that 3d animation, though. Fun to collect the data for that.

    btw - you don't have to read a sex book to come up with positions like that. If you're connected to your authentic self, and follow the whims of your spirit, you'll discover all sorts of fun.

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  3. BLT is the only man I've shared my most intimate desires or any kind of personal fantasy with. He's the only person I've felt safe enough to be so totally open with.

    And you know what? The sex with him is STUNNING. It's been nearly a year and still it gets better all the time. Just when I think we've hit the pinnacle of erotic pleasure together we share some new little tidbit, or we have an open conversation about what was/wasn't turning us on and it gets even better.

    I didn't even know I could have more than one orgasm before BLT, now it happens on a regular basis.

    Life is GOOD my friend! :D

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  4. I've never been as open with another lover/partner as I am with CBG. There's a certain amount of trust there that I've never had before and it's so....liberating. I've never felt so free to just be myself and express who I am without fear of judgment. Such a fantastic feeling. :-)

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  5. I see so much of myself in you, T. I'll have to experiment with the blog-public-portrayal of the sexual side of my personality. I love that you're so open, it reminds me to be open, too.

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  6. T, you never cease to amaze me!
    Thanks for the links. I'd like to add them to my blog but haven't figured out how to do that yet... blogger rookie... I love sharing fantasies with my GF and it does make for some VERY erotic SEX!
    We've been able to distinguish between the two.. sex and love making. I have to remember to throw in the "love making" too in order to keep balance... Too much fantasy and not enough Love, makes for an unhappy girlfriend.
    Now, the last time we adventured out to the City to a Sex Club was.. amazing.. to say the least. The best part was just watching my GF let go of all those hang ups and enjoy herself... When she does... it's the makings of an ever so HOT night... she opens up and then pulls back... but that's to be expected... she's dealing with her own stuff... Nothing better than on Open mind and a willingness to experiment!

    The mind is a terrible thing to waste!

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  7. Fantasy does indeed spice things up. And I'll add a "woo hoo" of my own to what you have said about erotica, and the very beautiful, very human aspects of it, in all its variations.

    It is so much more accepted elsewhere (dare I say, in France, where I have lived?) - would that we could have a little cultural exchange, when it comes to this particular hot topic. Yet one more reason why I find myself returning to France, to savor, whenever I can.

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  8. Ha, Mindy asked me if i had read this yet cause it reminded her of me!!!!
    Lately, I read wayyyyy more sex-ish blogs than I do mom blogs. Sorry I shouldn't be admitting that! I love all of the different dynamics out there. I would have to do a whole post on all of the sites I visit these days.
    In fact, you may be the reason I have become so curious over the last year. Love ya T!!!

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  9. Truly wish I was more open...I have a shell to come out of to explore much more, admittedly, and for now, can live somewhat vicariously through you right?? ;-) (though since I've started dating, I have had a few very memorable experiences that if my GRANDPARENTS weren't reading my blog, I'd likely post...ah, for another day) :-)

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Thank you for leaving me some comment love!