Thursday, October 7, 2010

Murder, Suicide and... our kids?

Yesterday, on the drive home from school, Rose was once again discussing a little boy in her class who "gets really mad all the time."

She's mentioned him since school began. This little boy can't seem to control his temper... so much so that he frequently throws things and/or flips his desk in the middle of class.

I've been impressed with Rose's teacher so far. She told us at "Meet the Teacher" night that she uses Love and Logic for disciplining children in her class. Bless her heart, this child has challenged her patience since school began!

Apparently, during class yesterday, the boy disrupted class again by threatening to kill someone.

When the teacher asked him about it, he, in front of the entire class, very coldly announced that he would most certainly do it... and didn't care if he got in trouble for it.

Rose said he was then permanently removed from her class.

I'm still in shock over this! This is an 8 year old in a third grade class! I kept wondering, "What in the world sort of life has this child led to be this way?" or "Is it a psychiatric or neurological thing?" (Don't even get me started on what we feed our children.)

I've never been a fan of giving children drugs. In fact, sadly, it has been reported that some medications only make things worse.

There were many articles last week about the teen suicide problem getting worse and worse.

I don't know what to say or think about this 8 year old child who has scared the wits out of my daughter's 3rd grade class. I don't know what to say or think about kids killing themselves.

What do we do about this?

Just when we thought talking about sex with our children was scary enough...

13 comments:

  1. Oh T - I don't know the answer to your question but I'm thankful for all the children, the boy's been removed. Hopefully, he's getting the help he so obviously needs.

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  2. I worked at a primary school for a bit and there was a child there who scared me this way. He would throw himself into walls, threaten teachers and other adults and the kids as well. They moved him to an alternative education setting. There was talk of abuse when young, though I don't know for sure. I hope he gets help though ... to have so much anger at such a young age is just scary.

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  3. Gosh T how scary for the whole class.

    This stems from many things I think - but there is clearly something happening at home (or not happening) to make this child react this way :(

    It is not normal and how scary for him to be so little and have such adult emotions and outbursts!

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  4. Where are the parents? Why haven't they put him in therapy or anger classes, or sports for that matter. Something to take the agression out on.
    My daughter shows signs of anger sometimes. If by a certain age it is still there or others are noticing it, you can bet that I am going to be doing everything in my power to help her deal with it.

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  5. if a child so young is talking in this manner and acting out so violently, it seems to me that the problem IS his parents. it seems safe to bet he's suffer abuse of some type at home.

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  6. You have to wonder about the home situation, when I child acts like this. Usually it's a sign of some sort of abuse. I kind of wish the teacher would have taken some initiative to maybe talking to child protective services. If anything, they could properly address what's going on with the parents.

    I hope more is being done for this boy, than just permanently removing him from the classroom.

    But yeah - things are getting scary, T. Children these days aren't staying innocent for as long as they use to. Which is very heartbreaking.

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  7. Absolutely terrifying. And it really does make me wonder what sort of home situation creates a child who could say and do such things. I also wonder what will become of him.....if he'll just keep getting lost in the system like so many people do...

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  8. When the PIT started to use the word "shit", I knew it was all her mothers fault. When the PIT started to throw things at the door when she was pissed, I knew that was her mothers fault. THAT was exactly what her mother TAUGHT her. Intentional or not, it doesn't matter. Kids are ALWAYS learning. I think it's important to check who is and who should be teaching your kids the most.
    My guess.....his 'reaction' has been learned. Perhaps he has learned this from his parent(s) or from violent tv shows....who knows. The parents need to wake up and address their sons 'issues' before they have to discuss bail. How do we get parents to take responsibility for their children? That's not to say we have to do it alone, the parenthood is full of wonderful ppl and resources but seriously people...TEACH your children well....remind me to do the same ;)

    Love you T
    xoxox

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  9. Feel compassion for the kid, and tell your daughter that you're glad the school removed him so he can get the help he needs.

    Some kids do need a ton extra help, due to the circumstance of their upbringing. I hope this boy turns out all right.

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  10. Truly you are very lucky that his threat was taken seriously and the boy was removed from the class, and hopefully his outburst was followed up on in some other ways.

    That is not always the case in some schools. Sometimes a teacher or school counselor can notify child protective services and not much will be done, or followed up on consistently. It is very sad and disheartening to see how many kids sometimes fall between the cracks for a variety of reasons. There is a breakdown of so many systems it seems like.

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  11. T - Bullying and school violence has been on my mind tonight. Read about the teen suicides in OH. I was disturbed when my 9 year old matter of factly described what they did during their "lock down" drill. I was so sad that my sweet little guy could possibly be in such a scary situation at a place where he loves his friends and learning.

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  12. I think that kind of disruptiveness has always been there but its incidence gets very exaggerated - I mean, how many "School day went by with nothing much untoward happening" stories do you see given the thousands and thousands of schools there are in the US? My adoptive father was a teacher and later a headmaster, mostly in primary schools, and he encountered all of those behaviours and more. But the intense media coverage wasn't there.

    The other thing is, your child was lucky in having a teacher and a supportive school who didn't expect her and her classmates to have to deal with this. But like you, I hope the child and his parents get the support they so obviously need...

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  13. Thats horrible. Teen suicides really are getting worse. In early September right before school started a 15 year old girl that I knew and that was very good friends with my boyfriends sister killed herself. Very sad day for everyone that knew her. But it's not just teens.A good friend of mine's mom killed herself when he was young and another girl I knew her father killed himself. It's so sad when people feel the need to do that.Especially teenagers.

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