Thursday, October 28, 2010
A Public Service Announcement for Partners of Hormonal Females
I don't really have any good advice for you. When you ask, "What can I do?", I really don't know.
Hormonal issues don't ALWAYS mean depression. It doesn't mean a death spiral into months of suicide watch or anything. It just means ... hey, I'm temporarily sad. I'll get over it.
There's no need to get frustrated and feel helpless. Sadness isn't something you can talk into submission. It just IS. There's no logic or rationale behind it, especially where hormones are involved.
You can talk to me logically and rationally all that you want but I'm emotional.
Emotional <> Logical
That doesn't mean the logical person that you know is completely gone. It doesn't mean that I don't KNOW that I'm allowing this bad feeling right now. It doesn't mean that I don't REALIZE I'm not being rational.
But at the moment, the grown-up in me is tersely looking down at the 3-year old who's throwing a temper tantrum inside of me.
If I've learned anything from being a mom, sometimes, those temper tantrums are better left ignored and allowed to run their course. Just wait patiently and I will be back to normal soon.
Just like always...
I had no idea that getting a little bit of extra love and nurturing from my daughters (who lovingly and instinctively know what to do when Mommy feels like this) would make me feel better. Maybe I just need my girlfriends. Maybe I need my mom.
Yes, I know that men can't get away with feeling sad for more than a day. I realize that other guys would say, "Get over it" to each other. I'm sorry. It's a little different for us girls. I'm sorry if it doesn't seem fair.
And to my man in particular (or any other long distance partners out there), I KNOW that if you were with me, YOU would be doing the nurturing, the holding, the loving adoration. Which is yet another reason why this is so hard for me and you. You can't. You aren't here.
Which brings out even more of the tantrum.
I CAN tell you this, my sweet love:
If you will continue to be patient and understanding, if you will stop talking when I ask you to (since right now, any and everything you say will and can be used against you), if you will continue to check in on me, try to make me laugh, let me know you're thinking of me (even when I know I'm irritating the crap outta you)...
if you keep doing THAT...
...the next time I see you I will suck your dick so good that your head will spin.